Here’s a little ditty dedicated to those that protect us from the ravages of capitalism.
Sung to the tune of Bachman-Turner Overdrives’s “Taking Care of Business”
Regulating Business
You had a great big yearnin’,
So you did a lotta learnin’,
And then you were feelin’ really witty.
Well, I’m workin’ for the Gov.
And I’m a-doin’ what I love,
So profit’s are gonna be a pity.
And if you make a dime,
I’m gonna declare it a crime,
And be filin’ a lawsuit within a day.
So now I’m feelin’ overjoyed,
And your staff is unemployed,
And so they’ll stay, no matter what you say.
And I’ll be…
Regulating business—every day,
Regulating business—every way,
I’ve been regulating business ‘cause it’s all crime,
Regulating business and banning overtime.
Work less!
No matter what you’re wishin’,
You’ll be charged with price-fixin’,
And fined until it makes you bellow.
Your reputation I’ll mar,
‘Til you’re drinkin’ in a bar,
And your CFO’s a convicted felon.
Though they say I’m a Hun,
You’re just jealous ‘cause I won,
When I notified the EPA.
Now of work you are devoid,
And you’re all unemployed,
But maybe you’ll work for us someday.
Then we’ll be…
Regulating business—every day,
Regulating business—every way,
I’ve been regulating business ‘cause it’s all crime,
Regulating business and banning overtime.
Work less!
Repeat till you puke.
