Memorandum
From: The Memo Writer
Topic: Behavioral Primer for Those Cursed with Logic, Reason, and Intelligence
Definition: The term “The Herd” is used to describe whose lives are spent validating Socrates’ statement that the unexamined life is not worth living. A person whose idea of distinction is being far more average than usual.
Item 1: There actually never was a memo that you missed. Members of The Herd absorb ideas and behavior passively from the environment. They’re not being obstinate or cruel when they don’t tell you their motivations for inane or insane behavior. It just never occurred to them that there ought to be a motivation.
Item 2: Stupid people don’t know they’re stupid. Internalizing this one can add decades of productive time to your life.
Item 3: Crazy people don’t know they’re crazy. This one is a real time saver too. Warning!: An important corollary of the preceding—psychotic people can suppress their symptoms for as long as it takes you to marry them. Trust me, I know whereof I speak.
Item 4: Ugly people don’t know they’re ugly. This is a survival mechanism because if they did know they would have committed suicide long ago. Attention!: You’re not as good-looking as you think you are either.
